Syonan Gallery : The Art And Fart Of Naming Convention

syonan

By: B Goode

So our Propaganda Minister, Yaacob Ibrahim finally admitted defeat and decided to re-name Syonan Gallery into something loooooooong…

But the name change happened not before he gave a good fight in trying to explain stuff.

In the first place, if you had to explain the meaning of a name, it simply meant that the name wasn’t that great to begin with. A good name should be self-explanatory. The meaning should be inherent and obvious. The same reason why the National Museum is called just that and not The Stamford Building.

The same reason why this website has a terrible name because people still think that it is a website devoted to religion….

And I guess the same reason why Syonan Gallery has now been changed to Surviving the Japanese Occupation: War and its Legacies.

A mouthful, yes. Self-explanatory, yes. Long, YES!

But not to worry. People will just call it The Ford Factory.

Like many others, when I first heard of the name Syonan Gallery, I said: WTF? I thought it was a place to glamourise the life under the Japanese until it was explained to me that it was actually a place to document the terror and atrocities of Japanese occupation.

Which brings me to the second point:

You see, words are like humans. They are not born equal. Some words are more powerful and when put together with another word, they will dominate and infused it with its own aura.

Take Syonan Gallery for example. You might think that between the two words, Syonan is the powerful one. Nope. It is the seemingly decent and innocuous word, gallery.

When people mention the word gallery, people will think of art, music, sculptures, paintings and other nice cultural stuff. So when you put another word with Gallery, that word automatically becomes nice.

That’s why you can never find something called The Nazi Gallery.

But you will find a lot of things with the word Durian in it….mmmm yum….

But it doesn’t matter now. It is all water under the bridge.

And with Yaacob Ibrahim apologising for the naming booboo only after much condemnation, it just proved the point that:

Sorry seems to be the hardest word.

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CFE Report : The Bold Alternatives

prostitute

By: B Goode

The report by the Committee on Future Economy (CFE) is already out. It was old news I know. But I had to spend a few days just to google all the big words and phrases used within. If the late Goh Keng Swee had vetted the report, he would have given it a big fat zero for the lack of brevity.

And maybe a 2/10 for substance. Continue reading

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Even A Tree Will Die Someday

tembusu

RIP

By: B Goode

This Valentine’s Day, I thought of going to the Botanic Gardens to snap a photo of myself under the giant Tembusu tree just like I did so many years ago. Just me and my hand.

But alas, the tree is gone, bringing with it the life of a woman. RIP. Continue reading

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A Malay President In September But Is Any Malay Keen?

halimah2

By: B Goode

So that’s it. There will be a Malay President this September.

Although it is still seven months away, by now there should already be one or two candidates who would have put their names in the hat. I am not going to flog a dead horse but Dr Adrian Tan had his name up in the sky way, way before the sky was even created. He was like that guy who queued for Samsung Note52. Continue reading

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And So It Begins : Malaysia’s Search For The Bogeyman

boogieman2

By: B Goode

Like day follows night; like spring follows winter; like a retiree follows the Batam ferry; like PM Lee’s selfies; like me going to church on Sundays (so true); some things in life are as predictable as Kim Kardashian’s hoe game. Continue reading

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Cocks, Pussies And A Reason To Cull Our Policymakers

cock

By: B Goode

Sad news for us chicken lovers.

After some serious deliberations (about 2 minutes whilst secretly playing Candycrush on their smartphones), our clueless bureaucrats have decided to cull the foreign-import chickens that lined the backlanes of Geylang.

heylang

Oh wait! Wrong channel. Sorry. Continue reading

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Lock, Stock And The Muslim Ban

refugees1

By: B Goode

Love him or loathe him, the man with a dead Golden Retriever on his head (it was a Pomeranian actually) is now the most powerful man on earth.

Inevitably, the man with the small hands has between his fingers the most powerful pen in the world. Continue reading

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Chinese New Year Is Never The Same

cny

WARNING: This article contains a sickening dose of nostalgia

By: B Goode

When a minister got overly excited over the prospect of the return of our seized terrex tanks and urged Singaporeans to celebrate Chinese New Year with them, you knew that Chinese New Year had lost some of its charms. Continue reading

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Sleeping With The Enemy – Communist China Vs The Free World

china

By – B Goode

Someone needs to tell Trump that China is a communist state, lest he forgets like Obama does.

While he’s at it, tell him to remind the other leaders of the free world that China is still ruled by the communist doctrine which among other things include world domination.

Remind them also of the many wars fought in the name of freedom. And the thousands upon thousands perhaps millions of lives and limbs lost because they were told of the threat to freewill, freedom, democracy and humanity that communism posed. Continue reading

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We Singaporeans Helped To Build The Nation Too, You Know?

tree

By: B Goode

Just the other day I was sitting alone under the banyan tree nursing my broken heart and empty wallet reminiscing about the days gone by, checking my phone balance and thinking :

“How the hell did I end up broke and sitting alone under a banyan tree?” Continue reading

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Things I Wish Had Died In 2016

celeb-d-t

By: B Goode

With 2016 taking so many well-known celebrities with it, it had me scrambling for news about Anita Sarawak. She’s fine. No worries.

So in-between going to the toilet because I had too much Anchor Beer for the New Year (my friends are cheap), I managed to put together the things I wish had died in 2016: Continue reading

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Amos Yee : All The Best To The Petulant Manchild

amos

By: B Goode

Without being cynical, I sincerely wish Amos Yee every success in his endeavour to lead a new life in the US as a refugee. If I could write a referral letter for him I would but I have no idea who is in-charge of the US now.

Love him or loathe him, he has decided to find a safe space for himself in the land of the free and I for one would like to wish him well. He needs every luck bit of luck and a lot of hard work. Continue reading

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It Feels Right To Be A Human In Singapore

human

By: B Goode

As the opportunistic leprechauns gather at Hong Lim Park to exercise their freedom of speech to protest the lack of freedom of speech in Singapore, I am preparing to go to JB to get myself a new irony board. My old one has been burnt by the heat of sarcasm.

Today is World’s Human Rights Day. If you are confused as to what this human rights thing is all about, don’t worry, let me confuse you even more. Continue reading

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AWARE : Time For REAL Women To Be Represented By A REAL Women Organisation

fem

By: B Goode (who is an attack helicopter trapped in a man’s body)

If you were to go to the Institute Of Mental Health (IMH) and if you were to tell the psychiatrist that you identify yourself neither as a man or woman, chances were, you’d be certified insane and be given a dose of medicine that would make you so dumb and so numb that you’d spend your time lying in your bed thinking about the meaning of life.

And if you saw someone like this walking along Orchard Road….

fem2

…..chances are, he, she or it is a member of AWARE (Association of Women For Action And Research) Continue reading

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Stop Undermotivating The Kids

logic

By: B Goode

 

If I had scored a 221 for my PSLE and grew up to be a loser blogger, would I want to post it in the internet to let everyone know? Oh wait. I just did that.

Nevermind. Continue reading

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Workers Party (WP) Bernard Chen Jiaxi : You OK Bro?

bernard

By: B Goode

Something disturbing dropped in my email over the weekend. No its not porny stuff. That would be considered as normal and expected. I mean, what’s so disturbing about animal sex?

Someone wrote to me about WP member Bernard Chen Jiaxi. Bernard who? I was scratching my head too. Continue reading

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F1 : The Glamour Is Gone So Let’s Just Move On

f1

By: B Goode

F1 supremo Bernie Whatshisnamestone said that Singapore might withdraw from the F1 circuit because we treated the F1 like a used tissue paper or something to that effect.

He was telling the truth, you know. Continue reading

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We Don’t Need No Edukation

teacher

By: B Goode

Students beating up other students. Students having sex-themed orientation camps. Students taking upskirt photos of teachers .Teachers resigning in exasperation.

WTF is happening in our schools? Continue reading

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Trump’s Triumph : The Conservative Backlash

backlash

 

By: B Goode

Took me three days to recover from my depression caused by Trump winning the US Elections. Losing a $50 dollar bet to a swanky friend was enough to trigger me into the depths of melancholy.

Many others were just stumped and shocked. How could a bully, womanizer, bigot, chauvinist etc be elected as the most powerful man on earth, they asked. In fact, just pick a good word, find its antonym and you will have a description for Trump. Continue reading

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The Malay Presidency : The Brutal Truths

ep1

By: B Goode

PM Lee’s confirmation that 2017 will see a Malay President installed has caused a great schism not seen in Singapore since the 1988 inter-JC debate.  Amongst armchair critics that is. Like myself.

Both sides have valid reasons and concerns. And it is the type of issue where sitting on the fence seems like the most comfortable position to be. Continue reading

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