By: Arthur Ah Ter Kia
So many people with so many ideas. Some awesome. Mostly meh!
So here we have our very own list on the ways to remember LKY. Remember folks. This is satirical. Not satanical.
- Drink Black.
Why #wearblack when you can drink black and internalise all your sorrows? And it’s not April yet so you can get drunk in public places.
- Wear Green
He is known as the architect of the Garden City. But by green we don’t mean marijuana.
- Wear Red
Why not? According to Chinese custom, when someone as old as LKY passed away, it is alright to wear red. You don’t know meh?
- Wear A Fruit
Not enough with the greening of Singapore, he also asked for fruit trees to be planted. It was alright initially until foreign talents came and thought that the fruits belonged to their grandfathers.
- Wear Like A Nazi
What better way to mourn a dictator than to wear a nazi costume and give him a nazi salute. Gilbert Goh, you in?
- Or wear this:
To remember his stop-at-two policy. And we heard it’s raining now too. So yeah!
- Do The 91 Karmasutra Positions
And call it KY91. It’s better than doing 9 burpees and 1km of running like that Minister. It’s healthy too you know? Better still, try the nine-shallow-one-deep technique.
He was obsessed with orderliness. So go find a queue or make one. Oh wait! You are already in one! He would have been so proud! And don’t forget to be a champion grumbler whilst you are at it.
9. Refrain From Gambling
Stop gambling. Petition for the casinos and the 4D outlets to be closed. Oh wait. We just did. Oh by the way, LKY’s IC number ends in 0001.
- And finally…remember to go to work tomorrow!!!
- And vote for his son in the next election ok?