38 Oxley Road Season Finale : 38 Conclusions

or

By: B Goode

Not in order of merit. In fact, there is no merit whatsoever.

  1. The Prime Minister of Singapore likes to cry. It is never a pretty sight.
  2. Parliament can assume the role of a Judiciary to question the Head of the Executive who in-turn assumes the role of the Judiciary to issue a verdict of innocence on himself. Confused? Me too!
  3. As such, all government legal departments including the Police and the Courts can now be closed because Parliament can do the job for them.
  4. Parliament needs a carpet. A big one.
  5. Whoever that maintains Parliament House needs to check on the smoke-detectors.
  6. Low Thia Khiang needs to learn the art of hammering a nail into a coffin. Skill Level : 1.
  7. Sylvia Lim likes to hunch her back when she speaks. Very unglam.
  8. Indranee Rajah is due for promotion.
  9. Whip or no whip, rice bowls are still evidently more important for the PAP MPs. That is understandable `cos good paying jobs are scarce outside.
  10. It is not over `cos we have yet to hear the fat lady sing.
  11. Speaking of which, MP Rahayu is getting fat.
  12. Forget chemistry. Forget science. Parliament has proven once and for all that blood is indeed thicker than water.
  13. In fact, Parliament has agreed that blood is even thicker than precedents.
  14. `Blood is thicker than water’ will now be accepted as mitigation for people accused of harbouring their criminal relatives because Parliament has said so.
  15. DPM Tharman didn’t say a word. Hmmm..
  16. ESM Goh knows. He knows. He knows more than what he’s telling us.
  17. Heng Swee Keat is able to stand. Congratz!
  18. It only took two days for PM Lee to absolve himself of any wrongdoings. It would take forever to clear his tarnished public image.
  19. And only Lee Kuan Yew himself would be able to return his family’s good name to its former glory. But he’s dead. RIP.
  20. 38 Oxley Road is now officially a haunted house for the Lee’s.
  21. 3802, 3800, 3834 and their permutations are all sold out! Damn!
  22. Tom Cruise will play Lee Hsien Loong if Hollywood decides to turn it into a movie. Brad Pitt as Lee Hsien Yang. Tommy Lee Jones as Lee Wei Ling.
  23. It would be a comedy.
  24. All the possible candidates to replace PM Lee didn’t say a word except Lawrence Wong because he had to explain the deed of gift, and Heng Swee Keat. Yay!
  25. Kudos to DPM Teo for being able to keep his work in the special Cabinet Committee a secret from his boss.
  26. Kudos to both DPM Teo and PM Lee for not casually chit-chatting about the case to each other. Something that not many people can do.
  27. I am running out of points.
  28. Parliament sitting started on time. This proved that if you were not taking the MRT, you could reach your workplace on the dot.
  29. Be right back. Need more beer.
  30. Still drinking.
  31. According to the internet, PM Lee should sue his siblings.
  32. But PM Lee only reads The Straits Times.
  33. PM Lee wants everyone to move on.
  34. But everyone wants PM Lee to move out.
  35. Parliament has decided that 38 Oxley Road is historically important thus cannot suka suka demolish without a special Cabinet Committee being set up.
  36. The National Theatre was demolished just like that to make way for a road.
  37. PM Lee concludes that the air is now clear.
  38. They really need to check on the smoke detectors.

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